Within the past two weeks we have lost two of our very dearest of friends.  Judy and Lori were both naturalists who taught us all a lot.  They walked their talk.  I loved them both dearly.  

It's surreal.

 Bears repeating:

Vietnam, 1969:

As an advisor and liaison I led native troops but nonetheless was looked upon as the "supreme local power", way too much power for a very young man, just out of adolescence. I used my power as a good soldier at first, fighting who was perceived and inculcated in me as the enemy. . .and if I didn't do it, I had the definite impression that very little would get done. . .However, after nine months I had an epiphany in the form of a chopper pilot asking for permission to engage, "Three military aged males with packs and weapons evading"...rote, scripted, common parlance. For some reason it was too pat, too familiar. I asked for his altitude, to which he replied some distance which would make identification of packs and weapons or gender nigh on to impossible. I suggested he go closer to find the true nature of his target. I didn't hear back from him for an inordinate length of time. So, I keyed the mike and asked if he'd identified his intended target. He responded, "Yes, disregard...it was a mamasan with two baby sans doing their laundry by a river." How many times in the past had I cleared requests to fire? Never again in any time of uncertainty would I be so gullible. I became the meanest bastard in my area of operations...unless there was contact, I generally denied requests for fire. I became very anti-war at that moment...always before it had been a song at summer camp, an idea...not a mind blast of reality. I was forever changed.

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Shared with Your friends and Cheryl's friends

The temperature outside when we awoke this morning was minus 24° (F) which is minus 31° (C), without wind chill. The sun is shining brightly now, the PV panels are pumping a good charge into our batteries, and the wind is fairly non-existent. Still, the cats wrinkle their nose when the door is opened and the cold hits them square in the face...they turn around and head for their respective hibernation spots. Tigger on the settee in front of the fireplace. Goldie is on the sunny south window ledge in Cheryl's work space, the Baby Buddha is practicing downward facing dog on the Bali bed and Pogo, true to her name, has jumped up onto her loft, where she can look out the back windows and have an overall view of the sunny rooms and other cats. Cheryl handed me a wonderful dark aeropressed cup of coffee which is now gone...I don't usually do this, but I am about to have another cup. (Monkey see, monkey do...Cheryl had another half cup earlier, which is unusual for her, as well.)

Reflecting on how peaceful it is here, quiet and (perhaps) mundane in its Earthly pleasures. How the snow that has accumulated dampens sounds, but still allows the chickadees spring songs to waft through. A cat is lightly snoring, I believe it's Pogo....

Why is this not common? Why is there so much fussing and fighting, divisiveness and discontent?

We are under siege

 The Gravy Seals, untrained, unfit but highly paid, many of whom, I suspect, are pardoned January sixers, are creating chaos in our state, specifically in Minneapolis.  As of this writing, 6 or 7 of ICE "agents" murdered an ICU nurse who was armed, yes...but his weapon was holstered and he had a permit to carry which is legal in Minnesota.  The "disarmed" him after pummeling him and spraying him on the ground and THEN they shot him multiple times.  The video doesn't lie.  Even Bondi, Noem and Bovino did not say the pistol was being brandished, but merely that he was armed...which is his second amendment right, and yet they say that he was attempting to assassinate ICE agents...and that they were the victims.  Clearly the video shows and agent removing the weapon and running from the space...before they opened up on the nurse.  

It was murder.

The second murder of an innocent in Minneapolis by the hands of ICE agents.  American citizens.

Anyone who believes in the right to bear arms and the second amendment certainly should not be supporting this administration.  This is what you've all feared.  A govermnent over reaching.  Fascism.

 Rummaging through writings from 1988/89

11 Dec 1988

Riding on horseback up steep mountains and through ravines carrying UNICEF medical bags to a distant gathering village along the northern border with Honduras. Our mission is to provide first aid, vaccinations and various medications to try to cover for clinics and medics who have been killed in Contra attacks. Clinics and schools, medics and teachers are the primary target of US backed and advised Contra forces. I accompany two Nicaraguans, a doctor trained in Canada and a nurse trained in Germany.

Beautiful country, Contra infested. Parrots flutter from tree to tree.

12 Dec 1988

A four hour ride yesterday, one way into the cloud shrouded mountains. The war (and its effects) is omni-present. Visual manifestations of damage to objects and people, teachers...schools...first aid stations. We were shadowed by a platoon of the FSLN, the Sandinistas...but that almost seems to ensure attack. RPGs, AK-47s send me into flashbacks.

It was dark on our return. The moon just a sliver and the stars bright as bright can possibly be. The sounds of the jungle immensely powerful. We left at 0800 and it is now past 1800. The truck which was to pick us up at a rendezvous point wasn't there. The horses had been taken to a way station and we waited. The truck arrived an hour late, it had broken down in a ditch and had to be recovered by oxen. I took the driver's seat. The mud from the rain made the clay road slick as ice. I said, "This is how we drive in a Minnesota winter"...The soldiers in the back hung on for dear life. Slipping, sliding, careening from side to side...slowing then accelerating...we kept moving forward. Someone banged on the roof of the cab. The soldiers wanted out...there was a contra base very near. They feared attack. Fanning out, the doctor, nurse and I were left alone in the truck with the headlights still on, engine running. We were apprehensive to say the least. Time stood still. Lights off, engine off. Quiet was deafening.

The soldiers returned...no sign of the contras. We continued our journey back to my tent by the river. Back to a perimeter.

 Let's face it.

This nation was not built on love and hope and equality, it was forged from blood, oil, extraction, genocide, slavery, money, patriarchy, and species decimation.

We need a different system of governance. Perhaps the entire world needs it, because this is true most everywhere with the possible exception of Bhutan.

Visitor in the night